Forgiving the Unbecoming

Many years ago, when I was coaching for National University in the Philippines, I chewed out one of my players during a timeout. Afterward, it hit me that what I had done was not honorable, and not worthy of a coach.

What made me do it?

I remembered that before the game, I had watched on TV a coach whom I admired, berating his player for missing a defensive assignment. I had copied what he had done even when it was demeaning and destructive. I committed to never do it again, and God in His grace did not allow me to repeat such a regrettable incident in my coaching career.

About 20 years later, when I was the deputy commissioner of the league, all the former players of National University came to support the team when they entered the finals. I saw my former player whom I had berated, and I pulled him aside so I could apologize and ask for his forgiveness. He said he couldn’t even remember the incident. Yet, I humbled myself before him because what I had done was not right.

Asking for forgiveness was liberating! Confession led to repentance and to restoration. After that, I hugged him like I would my son.